I have a lot of girlfriends that are on this merry-go-round of super stress out. It starts first with a need to have a perfect house and perfect kids and taking care of the perfect house and picking up the slack at work, and, and, and! When you suggest that they are doing too much, it comes out in anger or tears, or both. “I know I do this and this and this and this and I do not get any help.” Then you ask why do you do all these things? This is a very good question.

The image in my head is the circus performer that is standing on one foot, has three plates spinning and is hopping through hoops. Control. If you put the one plate down then the other 20 could fall. Then fear takes over. “If I don’t do it all then who will do it. Then on top of all of this stuff I do no one even says thank you.”

I offer a solution. Surrender! Can you surrender? Can you just allow the day to unfold before you instead of having every moment decided and planned out? Can you ask for help? Can you allow that house to just be? I feel it already the anxiety. No way! My Mom will be angry if I do not take her to the Doctor. My husband will be angry if the house is not clean. The kids need new clothes for school, I will let them down. Do you see a theme here? Every one of the fears comes back to a fear of what other people think of you? Truth be told, every single person sees things differently. Each and every person has their own perspective. You could try and try and try, but no one will ever see you the way you want them to. The only person that could ever see you that way is you. I am talking about seeing the “real” you, the “I am” perfect from deep inside me. When you can surrender to a true belief that you are perfect just the way you are, the need for control looses it hold on you.